Full of Surprises
by J Daydreamer
Summary: It's Myka's birthday and Helena is full of surprises.
It's just another day. That's what Myka tells herself when she tumbles out of bed that morning. She repeats the words as she applies her make-up and brushes her hair to get ready for work. It's just another day, she thinks again as she enters the kitchen for some much needed coffee.

Helena sits at the little table drinking tea and reading her tablet, the sheer robe she wears doing little to conceal the sleep clothes she still wears underneath. Her dark hair is disheveled from sleep and her face is devoid of make-up and really no one should be that attractive after just waking up but Helena manages to be every single morning. Myka would be irritated if she weren't so infatuated.

Helena drags a hand through her hair to restore it to some level of order as as Myka makes her way to the coffee maker gurgling noisily in the corner.

"Good morning," Myka says taking a mug from the cupboard to pour the coffee into.

"Good morning, Myka," Helena returns in between a yawn.

Myka chuckles. "Sleep well?" she asks, reaching above the refrigerator to pursue the cereal selection. A shake of the box of cheerios does not fare good results and Myka quickly scribbles the brand name onto the grocery list stuck to the fridge.

"Sleeping went well, it's always the getting up that's the challenge," Helena answers dryly.

"Mmm," Myka nods giving Helena a sympathetic smile before turning her attention back to breakfast.

A look around the kitchen reveals there are no bananas left, no apples and only the heel left on the bread to use for toast. "I knew I should have gone shopping yesterday," she mutters, pushing the bread away in distaste. She doesn't have time to scramble an egg and when her stomach gurgles in hunger, she seriously considers raiding Helena's box of Lucky Charms. How a woman so seemingly sophisticated as Helena is can eat a "child's" cereal for breakfast is beyond Myka's comprehension but the one time she'd asked her about it, Helena had insisted they were 'magically delicious.' Myka might have taken the response seriously if it hadn't been delivered in a faux Irish accent.

"We'll go tomorrow night," Helena assures.

"Yeah. In the meantime, mind if I steal some of your cereal?"

"You know you're always welcome to anything I have," Helena answers. "But, knowing you don't care for that, perhaps I can offer you something better?"

Myka turns around to look at Helena as she stands and reaches inside a cupboard. With her back turned, Myka takes the opportunity to study the shape of Helena's calves as she reaches inside the cupboard, the way her robe only falls to the top of toned thighs, and the way that robe hangs open to reveal matching lavender shorts and a camisole that appear to be made of satin? And as Myka trails her eyes upward to notice a low neckline of lace, it dawns on her that Helena has turned around to face her. Her eyes snap up to meet dark eyes staring at her intently.

"Happy Birthday, Myka," Helena says, the smirk on her face telling Myka she knew exactly where her eyes had traveled to. Myka feels her face flush at being caught and it takes her a moment to realize that Helena is holding out a small plate with a large muffin complete with a single birthday candle in the middle.

"Is that from Leena's?" Myka asks, eyes wide.

"It is," Helena smiles. "Apple strudel, your favorite. I asked Leena to set one aside yesterday and stopped on my way home from work for it."

"Helena, you didn't have to go to all that trouble," Myka says surprised but pleased.

Helena waves her off. "I wanted to. Now, sit down," she instructs as she places the plate on the table.

Myka does as told, sitting at the small table and watches amused as Helena flits about the kitchen opening and closing drawer after drawer in search of something. She takes a sip of coffee before asking, "What are you looking for?"

"Matches. I thought for certain we had some," Helena responds slightly flustered.

"That's really not necessary," Myka bemoans eyeing the lone candle.

"Of course it is, it's your birthday. I bought that candle specifically for you to make a wish but it's useless without being lit first."

"Fine," Myka sighs defeated. "Try the drawer to the left of the stove."

Helena returns to the table with matchbox in hand, smiling triumphantly.

Myka decides this embarrassing ordeal might be worth it after all just to see Helena smile like that. She watches Helena strike the match and carefully light the candle before blowing out the lighted match. She takes her seat opposite Myka at the table and looks at her expectantly.

"Well, go on, darling, make a wish," she encourages.

And Myka knows it's childish to make wishes. Wishes don't make desires come true. That takes effort, hard work and maybe a little luck but at the moment with Helena's dark eyes watching her, she doesn't care. She knows what to wish for, exactly this. Helena sitting across from her at the table as she is this morning, a smile in her eyes, every morning for the rest of their lives.

Closing her eyes and taking a breath, Myka makes her wish and blows out the dancing flame.

She opens her eyes again to meet Helena's shining eyes.

"Very good," Helena approves. "I know not to ask what you wished for, but would it be too presumptuous of me to say that _my_ wish at the moment is that you would share this scrumptious muffin with your starving roommate?"

"Starving, really?" Myka laughs already standing from the table to grab a knife from the drawer.

"Perhaps not starving," Helena concedes. "I don't know why I didn't think to get another muffin knowing how mouth-watering Leena's pastries are."

"Now the truth is out. You're coveting my breakfast."

"I am," Helena admits unashamed. "And you're very sweet to share it with me."

"You know I wouldn't have it any other way," Myka says removing the candle to cut the muffin in half. She grasps her half between her fingers, taking a generous bite and sighs in contentment at the taste of sweetened apple. Helena quickly follows suit and the kitchen is silent for a long moment as they eat.

Helena is the first to finish, sucking her fingers into her mouth to divest them of the last remnants of the sweet morsel and Myka may have forgotten to breathe for the moment, let alone eat at the sight of Helena licking her fingers clean. And really how can such an action that is so unattractive every time she sees Pete do it after eating, well, anything, is so…so… _alluring_ when Helena does it. Lost in the reason behind that allure, it takes Myka another moment to realize Helena is talking to her.

"I'm sorry, what did you say?"

"I asked if we're still on for dinner tonight?"

"Dinner, yes of course," Myka nods stuffing the last piece of muffin into her mouth and rising from the table, she carries the empty plate to the sink and begins to wash her hands.

"You'll be home by five-thirty?"

"I should be, yes," Myka tells her.

"Good, I'll meet you back here and we can change and go to the restaurant together. Speaking of getting changed," Helena says glancing down at her robe, "I'd better get ready for work before I'm late."

Instead of retreating from the kitchen as Myka expects, Helena crosses the room to approach her, reaching out to give her arm a gentle squeeze. "Until tonight then, Myka, have a lovely day at work and happy birthday," she smiles.

"Thanks…thank you for breakfast," Myka stutters out. "And the birthday wishes."

"You're welcome. See you tonight," Helena winks before hurrying out of the kitchen for good. And there it is again. Myka has forgotten how to breathe.

* * *

Myka is sorting through emails when a package of Twizzlers is dropped on her keyboard.

"Happy Birthday, Mykes," Pete grins at her. "I forgot to bring your actual gift with me to work, so I got those out of the vending machine down the hall."

"Thanks, Pete, I'm touched," Myka drawls.

"I aim to please."

Myka laughs. "Seriously though, you didn't have to get me anything. It's just another day," she shrugs.

"It not just another day. It's your birthday. The big three-O. You're getting old," he says shaking his head.

"Thanks for that," Myka says ripping into the Twizzlers and chewing on a strand. So what if it isn't yet nine o'clock in the morning, it's her birthday and she'll eat candy before nine if she wants to. Pete sitting on the edge of her desk moves to take one but she snatches the box away from him.

"Hey, hey, hey, I was just joking, Mykes," he whines.

Myka rolls her eyes but pushes the package towards him. "Fine."

Pete grabs a strand and bites off a chunk. "Besides, if it's twenty-nine and feeling fine, thirty's got to be better right?"

"You tell me," Myka says pointedly as she sucks on the candy.

"Ah, man, I loved being thirty. I wouldn't mind going back to thirty," he says reflectively as he glances down to his slightly protruding stomach. "But enough about me. Let's think of a rhyme for thirty that fits you. How about, thir-tay and feeling flay?"

Myka chortles. "Oh, that is so not right."

"Thir-tay and feeling fray?"

"You seriously think that's any better?" she huffs.

Pete thinks a moment, his forehead creasing with the effort to come up with a good rhyme.

"Don't hurt yourself, Pete," Myka grins.

"Ha-ha, look who's become a comedian in her old age." He takes another moment to think, snapping his fingers when he comes up with something. "I've got it! Thir-tay and feeling gay!"

Myka chokes on her Twizzler. "What?" she sputters.

"You know – like happy?" he explains.

"I know the meaning of the word, the multiple meanings of the word."

"Well I was going for the happy meaning. Although, now that you've alluded to it," he says, eyebrows waggling.

"Don't even finish that train of thought," Myka warns, cheeks flushed and hand fisted, ready to punch his arm if necessary.

Pete moves to protect his shoulder. "Okay, okay, since you asked so nicely. So, what are your plans for this evening anyway?"

And Myka really doesn't want to divulge her plans after his line of teasing, but it's Pete, so she does. "Helenaistakingmetodinner," she mumbles quickly.

"What? I didn't catch that – try again," he says cocking his ear closer to hear her.

Myka huffs out a sigh. "I said Helena is taking me to dinner, okay?"

Pete grins. "So is it like a date then?"

Myka wishes. "No, it's not a date, it's just going to dinner the way we have countless times before as friends and roommates."

"But you said she's taking you to dinner."

"She insisted on paying for my dinner tonight."

"Ah-ha! So it is a date!"

"It's not a date, it's for my birthday, Pete, nothing more. Taking me to dinner tonight is her gift to me."

"Well, it's not Twizzlers, but I guess dinner is good too, if you like that sort of thing."

"Says the man who lives for food. You'd love it if everyone gifted you food."

"Yeah, you got me there," he says stealing a second twizzler strand. "So is that what you're going to wear to dinner tonight?" he asks.

"Is there something wrong with what I'm wearing?" Myka asks looking down at dark slacks and a blue button-down blouse.

"No, it just doesn't seem very fitting for a dinner-date, that's all."

Myka glares at him. "I plan to change into something more suitable after work."

He nods approvingly. "You should wear a dress."

"Excuse me?"

"What? You look good in dresses, Mykes. And I bet Helena won't be able to take her eyes off you if you wear one tonight. You know, for your date," he smirks.

"For the last time, it's not a date, Pete," Myka says frustrated, already wishing this conversation was over.

"Okay, it's not a date," he agrees glumly. "But you wish it were, don't you?"

Myka meets his eyes, sees the sincerity reflected there, all trace of teasing gone. "Maybe," she admits softly.

Pete smiles at her. "That's what I thought. You've been carrying a torch for Helena for what's it been now – a year and a half?"

"Yeah," Myka gulps and how pathetic is that – to be in love with someone for that long a time with little hope of it if ever developing into a relationship.

"I think tonight's the night."

Myka furrows her brow. "The night for what?"

"To make your move on Helena."

"To make my move? What are you a teenaged boy? You expect me to use the old yawn and stretch move or something?" Myka asks annoyed.

"Hey, you know that one?"

"Everyone knows that one and I will not be using that or any other move on Helena tonight or any night."

"It's not a bad move under the right circumstances," he shrugs. "But I didn't really mean a literal move, Myka, I just meant, you know, that maybe you should use tonight to tell her how you really feel about her."

"Why is tonight so special?" she asks suspiciously.

"Uh, because it's your birthday," he says likes its an obvious reason.

"And what? You think she's not going to reject me just because it's my birthday?"

"Well…yeah. Because doing that on your birthday is just cruel. She'd at least wait to reject you the next day. I mean, if she were to reject you at all."

"I will never understand your logic, Pete, and I'm not confessing my feelings to Helena tonight because it's my birthday."

"Then when, Mykes?" he asks seriously.

"I don't know, okay? Maybe when I get some sort of sign from her that she might reciprocate my feelings."

"And if you never get that sign?"

"Then I won't tell her."

"Myka…"

"Pete, it's my life, okay? And Helena…Helena is the person I love most in this world. I don't want to lose her over some misguided feelings."

"Misguided? That's a funny word to use for love."

"You know what I mean. Having her in my life as a friend is more important to me than risking our friendship for something more."

"I don't know," Pete shakes his head. "If it were me, I think I'd go for broke, lay all my chips on the table and at least try for more."

Myka sighs heavily. "Things will either progress between Helena and I or they won't. But I'm not going to force something between us that isn't there. Now, can we please just stop talking about this?"

"You're the birthday girl," Pete surrenders, standing from the desk. "Hey, Mykes," he pauses thoughtfully, "I hope you and Helena have a great time together on your _not_ -date."

Myka huffs out a laugh. "Thanks, Pete."

"Anytime," he nods, swiping another Twizzler from the package before Myka can protest.

* * *

It's difficult to focus on work after her conversation with Pete. Helena is on the forefront of her mind. Myka considers that Pete may be right for a change, a fact that startling of itself. But maybe it is time to confess her feelings to Helena and let the chips fall where they may as the saying goes.

This is always the conflict anytime Myka even considers telling Helena how she feels. Yes, she wants more than friendship, but she doesn't want more at the cost of losing her friendship with Helena, a very real threat to Myka's mind. Because even if she doesn't lose Helena's friendship outright, things would become awkward between them and Myka couldn't bear that. She just wants Helena in her life in whatever capacity Helena is willing to give.

She feels the beginning of a headache coming on by the time her parents and Tracy call to offer well wishes for a happy birthday, her mother bemoaning the fact she can't see Myka on her birthday and Tracy complaining again that Myka wouldn't let her throw a party for her.

"You only turn thirty once," Tracy had said.

"Once is enough," Myka countered.

Her father oddly remains quiet after a generic happy birthday and Myka doesn't even want to contemplate what that means.

By mid afternoon she is so ready for the day, birthday or not, to be over with, except for one important reason, dinner with Helena.

She's eaten dinner with Helena more times than she can count, so tonight shouldn't be anything spectacular. But despite telling Pete this dinner is not going to be a date, it has that feel about it. They are going to dress for the occasion and Myka can feel her heart flutter with anticipation at the thought of what Helena might wear tonight.

* * *

Her heart is fluttering for an entirely different reason as she bursts into their apartment twenty minutes late from work.

"Helena? I'm so sorry I'm late," Myka calls out, rushing down the hall to stop in front of Helena's closed bedroom door. "I had a client call five minutes before I was supposed to leave and of course it had to drag on."

"It's alright, Myka. Just get ready now and we should still be able to make our reservation," Helena calls out from behind her closed door.

"Right," Myka says, scrambling for her own bedroom. She throws her coat and satchel onto a chair in the corner and opens her closet door, sliding hangars out of the way to get to the dress she planned to wear.

The dress of deep purple is simple but elegant. At least that's how Myka remembers it. She hasn't worn it in the two years she's known Helena. Even with the few dates she's been on since then, Myka always hesitated in wearing this particular dress, somehow knowing it wasn't meant to be worn for anyone other than Helena.

Myka hurriedly discards her slacks and blouse and slips into the dress, feeling the smooth fabric cling to her skin. She moves in front of her mirror to take in the fit, smoothing it down over her thighs and adjusting the dress at the bust line to pull the fabric slightly higher.

She drags a brush through tangled curls and reapplies lipstick to her mouth. After slipping into high-heels she grabs her coat and purse and hurries from her room, down the hallway to the living room where the sight of Helena stops her in her tracks.

"Hello, Myka," Helena greets her and there's a hitch in her voice Myka can't begin to comprehend. Not at the moment anyway. Not with Helena looking like _that_.

Helena in a dress is a sight that Myka is not often afforded. And always when she does see Helena in a dress, it is meant for someone else, a date or a night out with coworkers. Tonight, this dress of cerulean blue Helena is wearing is meant for Myka alone and her stomach flutters at the acknowledgement.

"Helena, you look incredible," Myka says, the words escaping her lips without permission. "I mean you always look good, even at six-thirty in the morning without make-up, but in that dress you…yeah," Myka tapers off lamely. "I don't remember ever seeing you wear it before."

"That's because it's new, I bought it especially for tonight. And I could say the same for your dress, Myka. I've never seen you wear it either," she says, eyes running over the length of the dress, taking in the way the fabric molds to Myka's slim figure, fitting her like a glove.

"It's…well, it's not new," Myka laughs under her gaze. "It's just never seemed a good time to wear it…until now."

Helena looks as if she wants to ask a question about that but swallows it down and says instead, "You're beautiful."

Myka palms her neck and averts her eyes down, suddenly unsure how to move forward. It's as she raises her eyes again to meet Helena's that she notices something she missed before. On the coffee table near where Helena stands is a large bouquet of flowers.

"You got me flowers?" she asks surprised.

"Yes, well, it's not as if we're not both going to enjoy them, so…" Helena tapers off, looking self-conscious.

"This is like the muffin this morning all over again, isn't it?" Myka teases.

Helena bursts out laughing. "I suppose it is," she says, dark eyes gleaming.

Myka gives the flowers a closer inspection, taking in their heavy scent and vibrant colors. "You got me lilies?"

"Tiger lilies to be more precise, yes. You did mention you liked them."

"I do," Myka says trying hard to regulate her breathing, knowing the meaning of these specific flowers, knowing Helena knows their meaning as well. _I dare you to love me._ Perhaps this is the sign she needs. Myka tries to formulate words, tries to say something, anything, but the moment too quickly passes.

"Well, shall we go to dinner then?" Helena asks when Myka doesn't say anything more.

Myka simply nods, the words she longs to say lodged deep in her throat.

* * *

Dinner is a pleasant affair, despite the earlier awkwardness simmering just under the surface of their usual banter and interesting conversation. The view from their table is serene. The harbor stretches out as far as the eye can see, sunlight dancing on the water, making it sparkle.

They order wine, toasting to friendship and when their food arrives, its habitual the way they share, each giving a portion of their meal to the other to taste and savor.

After dinner, Helena suggests a walk along the waterfront Myka readily agrees to. Mindful of the heels they wear, they walk slowly along the dock, soaking in the atmosphere, registering the salt that lingers on the air, the occasional cry from a gull flying above, and the water gently lapping against the rocks below.

They don't speak much, each of them lost in inner reflections and when Myka loses her footing on a board, Helena steadies her with a hand at her arm. She doesn't remove her hand after Myka has righted herself, instead she links their arms together as they continue their stroll and Myka's heart expands at Helena's gentle touch.

It's cooler near the water and when a breeze picks up and Myka shivers, Helena pulls her closer still and Myka wishes these few quiet moments together could last forever.

That wish is shattered the moment when Helena glances at her watch and startles at the time.

"Oh dear, I didn't realize it was getting so late. We should probably get back home – I have an early morning tomorrow," Helena hastily explains.

"Yeah, of course," Myka says feeling disappointed in the sudden change in mood and that their walk back is at a decidedly quicker pace than the leisurely stroll they just enjoyed.

The ride home is mostly silent and Myka can't help wondering what happened to their evening. Their walk on the dock had been so serene, Myka could feel the words lodged in her throat from before begin to work their way to the surface, waiting on her tongue for slightest provocation. And then Helena had looked panic-stricken when she noticed how much time had passed, and the words Myka held back remained unspoken.

The walk to their apartment is brisk and still confused by Helena's change in demeanor from their time on the dock, Myka is ready to call it an evening, letting go of any attempt to tell Helena how she truly feels about her and instead wants nothing more than to get out of the dress and heels to fall into bed, not stirring until morning. Myka pulls out her key, ready to do just that when a gentle hand on her arm halts her progress.

"Myka," Helena says softly, "before we go inside, I just want you to know I had a lovely evening tonight."

Hearing the sincerity in Helena's voice, seeing the truth in dark eyes, Myka feels her heart begin to race with fresh hope. "I did too, Helena. It's been a wonderful evening, probably the best birthday I've ever had, thanks to you," she admits.

A look passes through Helena's eyes that Myka can't decipher.

"I hope you'll…always feel that way," Helena says. And before Myka can ask her what she means, Helena takes a step closer, any question fleeing her mind as Helena's sweet scent engulfs her, and dark eyes remain fixed on hers. Just when Myka is certain Helena is going to lean forward to kiss her, she feels the keys in her hand being taken by Helena who slips them into the door and pushes it open, guiding Myka inside with a smile and soft hand at the small of her back.

The lights in the apartment flicker on and the chorus of "Surprise!" assaults Myka the moment she steps inside. Her living room is decorated in vibrant colored streamers and balloons and the room is full of people. The sight of practically everyone Myka knows in one space is so unexpected that all Myka can do is gape open-mouthed. Everyone is there, her parents, Kevin, Pete with his new girlfriend Kelly, Leena, Abigail, Claudia and Todd, Steve and Liam, Vanessa, even her crotchety neighbor down the hall, Artie is here. And at the forefront of the eclectic group is Tracy with bright eyes and a beaming smile, her hands clasped together under her chin in obvious eagerness to see Myka happy.

"Are you surprised, Myka? You look surprised," Tracy says gleefully.

"I am definitely surprised," Myka breathes out turning to look at Helena, unsure whom her answer is really meant for. Helena gives her an apologetic smile that also appears to be regretful? Myka has no idea how to interpret that. Was dinner, the walk after, all just a pretense for this surprise party?

"I wanted to do something special for you, Myka," Tracy is saying. "And I knew the party would be a success and you see it is," she says gesturing to the roomful of people and the party décor. "So, is it okay?" Tracy asks.

Myka detects the uncertainty in Tracy's question. She looks about the room again, sees all the smiling faces of the family and friends she loves. "Yeah, Trace, it's great," she answers, watching as Tracy's uncertain smile turns into a beaming one once more.

"Alright, let's get this party started!" Pete shouts turning on some music, making everyone laugh and allowing the group of people to fall into their own conversations.

"And you, Helena," Tracy teasingly scolds with a pointed finger, "you were supposed to have Myka back here over half an hour ago."

"My apologies. I lost track of the time," Helena says, her eyes looking past Tracy to meet Myka's.

"Well, don't let it happen again," Tracy laughs. "And you," she turns back to Myka, "Happy Birthday, big sis," she says hugging Myka before making her way into the small crowd of people to find her husband and leaving Myka with Helena at her side.

"Alright, darling?"

"Yeah," Myka answers. "It's just a lot to take in. Everyone is here...even Artie?"

Helena laughs. "Tracy insisted everyone possible be invited.

"Yeah, but I thought he disliked us?"

"You know that's not true. It's me he doesn't like. I take his morning paper one time and the man acts like I've committed a federal offense," she shakes her head.

"Technically stealing mail is a federal offense," Myka says.

"Semantics, semantics," Helena brushes off. "Anyway, he's actually rather fond of you. And once I told him Vanessa would be attending, not even his profound dislike for me would keep him away."

The two women look at the man who stares longingly at the tall, blonde-haired woman laughing with Steve and Liam at the moment.

"Do you think he'll ever tell her how he feels about her?" Myka asks.

"I don't know. I honestly hope that he will."

"Yeah," Myka sighs. "Well, I should probably say hello to my parents, make the rounds and say hello to everyone else too," Myka says.

"Of course, you should," Helena agrees, though the sound of her voice says she's hesitant to have Myka leave her side. "I've been meaning to catch up with Claudia anyway."

Myka nods, leaving Helena to seek out her parents, unaware that Helena watching her go has the same look of longing in her gaze as Artie did moments ago.

* * *

"I hate big surprises, Tracy knows that," Myka complains tiredly hours later as she drops onto the sofa littered with discarded wrapping paper and torn streamers. "And surprise birthday parties are at the top of my list of hated surprises."

Helena laughs taking a seat beside her, looking about the disheveled apartment they will eventually have to clean up. "She means well, Myka. I did try to dissuade her, knowing you wouldn't care for a party, but your sister is not easily dissuaded. I told her I was already taking you to dinner to celebrate, but she decided that was a perfect way to get you out of the apartment to set up the party."

"So, dinner wasn't part of the surprise party then?" Myka tries to clarify, feeling a surge of hope.

"No, Myka," Helena answers softly. "I wanted to take you to dinner to celebrate. Tracy's surprise party was just icing on the birthday cake," she smirks and Myka laughs.

"Besides, you seemed to enjoy it despite initial misgivings."

"It had its moments," Myka concedes. "I could have done without Pete stuffing three pieces of cake in his mouth at once."

"We all could have done without that."

"And I would have been more impressed if Tracy had stayed to help clean up," Myka says surveying the untidy room.

"I would have been impressed by that as well," Helena agrees. "But it will keep until tomorrow and I think the party was warranted. It was a monumental birthday for you. After all it's not everyday a beautiful woman celebrates her thirtieth birthday."

Myka's stomach flutters at being called beautiful by Helena for the second time in one evening, but she knows it's just Helena's way.

"Don't remind me," Myka groans. "Apparently now that I'm thirty, it's time to settle down, marry and start a family."

"Who told you that?" Helena frowns.

"Everyone."

" _Everyone_ , really?" and now Helena is smirking at Myka's dramatization.

"Okay, not everyone. My dad said it was time I moved into a nice house instead of living in this apartment, Tracy asked when I was going to finally find someone and you know my mom is waiting for the day that she gets grandchildren," Myka exhales in one breath. "Even Pete is likely to find someone to settle down with before I do."

"The difference is Pete wants to marry Ms. Right, settle down and have a family. You're focused on other things, namely your career right now, and there's nothing wrong with that Myka," Helena assures.

Myka bites at her lip, hesitant to say what's truly on her mind.

"What is it?" Helena asks noticing the lip-bite and what that action signifies for her friend and roommate.

"The thing is, Helena," Myka says softly feeling the words she's repressed all evening make their way to the surface again, "the _truth_ is, I do want those things. I mean, maybe not the kid part, I'm not sure I want kids, maybe a dog instead. You know I like dogs and…"

"Darling, you're rambling," Helena interrupts gently placing a soothing hand along Myka's thigh with the intent to help her focus.

Myka's pulse speeds up at the casual touch the same way it does anytime Helena touches her, no matter how insignificant it's meant to be.

"What exactly is it that you want?" Helena redirects the conversation.

It would take very little to blurt out the word on the tip of her tongue, _you_ , but instead she bites her lip again and takes a deep breath to rein in the admission.

Slowly she breathes out. "I want those things, Helena. I want a house and I want someone to share it with."

"Myka, if that's what you want then I'm sure you'll have those things."

"Will I? Helena, I'm thirty years old now. Most of the kids I went to high school and college with are married and well on their way to starting that next chapter in their lives. Compared to them…"

"Myka," Helena interrupts. "You can't compare yourself to others - you are incomparable. There is only one you in the entire world and you know better than anyone else how to live your life."

"I know. I do," Myka nods. "In my head I know that but…I still can't help the way I feel sometimes."

"And how is that?"

"That I want to be with someone and I'm afraid that it will never happen for me. I mean, I know some people like to believe there's someone out there for everyone," she waves a hand vaguely.

"And you don't?" Helena asks trying hard to suppress a smile.

"No. Some people go their entire lives without ever meeting the one."

" _The one_? That sounds quite serious. But think of all the fun some people have with multiples ones instead," Helena tries to joke.

"Helena, I'm being serious."

"I know you are. I had no idea turning thirty would have this affect on you. Consider, only yesterday you had no such worry as this."

"I did. I just didn't talk about it," Myka shrugs.

"I see," Helena nods thoughtfully.

"I don't want to be alone," Myka finally whispers, the sound plaintive.

"Myka," Helena speaks taking Myka's hand in hers. "You will never be alone, even if you never meet the one as you put it. Think of all the people that were here tonight to celebrate your birthday, your family and friends, people who care about you. You are not alone. Tonight was a testament to that."

Myka sighs, feeling a little bit of the weight she carries lift from her shoulders. "You're right. My family and friends are enough – _I_ am enough."

"Yes you are," Helena says, eyes sparkling with approval.

"I don't need someone by my side to live a fulfilling life," she goes on.

"Absolutely."

Myka sighs again, holding Helena's hand a little tighter. "I know I don't _need_ that…but I still _want_ that," she admits.

Now Helena sighs. "And that _want_ is an entirely different matter altogether."

"Yeah," Myka chokes out a laugh.

"Alright," Helena says resolutely, "if you're truly serious about wanting to be married someday, to spend your life with someone by your side, then I'll make you a promise."

With wide eyes and shallow breath, Myka eyes meets Helena's gaze as she continues on. "If you're still unattached by the time you're thirty-five, and if you're…amendable to the idea, we could marry each other."

A nervous laugh bubbles from Myka's throat. "Amendable?"

"Agreeable, willing," Helena explains and maybe Myka is reading too much into it, but Helena sounds nervous.

"I know the meaning of the word," Myka smiles. "But isn't the deal supposed to be if we're both unattached, not just me? I mean, five years is a long time. You'll probably be with someone else by then."

"I won't be," Helena says firmly.

"How can you possibly know that?" Myka asks incredulous.

"Because I realized some time ago that I'm in love with you, Myka," Helena answers honestly, pulling her fingers through her hair nervously.

"What?" Myka startles, feeling a wild hope bloom within her chest tempered with disbelief.

"I've been waiting for the right moment to tell you, had planned to tell you tonight after our dinner together actually, but then Tracy wanted to throw the surprise party and…and I've surprised you, haven't I?" Helena asks seeing the look of disbelief across Myka's features.

"I think that's putting it mildly, yeah."

"And you don't like big surprises," Helena says forlornly.

Myka reaches for Helena's hand, pulling into her lap, running her thumb along smooth skin. "I like this one," she says smiling when she sees a flicker of hope spark in Helena's eyes. "You've been full of surprises all day, big and small and I've loved each of them, this one most of all," she smiles warmly. "And I like the promise you made just now except for one thing."

"What?" Helena asks with baited breath.

"The five year term. Every movie I've seen or book I've read with that kind of pact between friends, it's obvious that the friends are secretly in love with each other and if they would just admit their feelings for each other, they wouldn't have to wait years for the pact to expire before acting on those feelings, but start their life together as soon as they want. And I love you, Helena. I have for a long time."

Helena intakes a sharp breath at Myka's declaration, grasping her hand. "Well, if you want to marry right away, I'm certainly agreeable to that, darling," she smirks, eyes shining.

Myka laughs. "I didn't necessarily mean _marry_ right away…maybe we should give dating a try first."

"Certainly if that's what you prefer, but I feel I should point out, we've lived together for over two years. I'd say there's very little we don't know about each other as it is."

"Well, there is one significant thing we don't know yet," Myka says shyly, green eyes imploring Helena to understand what she doesn't say.

Helena answers the silent plea, moving closer to Myka until their thighs touch. Gentle fingertips trace Myka's skin, slowly guiding her into a kiss that is at first a faint press of lips but soon turns soft and languid. The minutes pass by unnoticed as Myka's hands slip into Helena's hair encouraging Helena to deepen their kiss. The first touch of Helena's tongue against hers causes Myka to moan from deep within her throat, the sound of it making Helena press forward until they're both breathless with desire.

Myka curls herself around Helena's neck, holding her close as Helena presses the softest of kisses at the underside of her jaw, her cheek, her temple, Myka shivering at the sensation of those perfect lips against her heated skin.

"You know the wish I made this morning?" Myka husks against Helena's ear, the tone of her voice causing Helena to tremble against her.

"Yes?"

"This is what I wished for. I wished for you, Helena – for their to be an us," Myka confesses softly.

"Oh, darling," Helena says pulling back only enough to meet Myka's eyes, bright with happy tears. "That's what I wished for too."

Myka isn't a bit surprised.


End file.
